I am sorry that I hadn’t been active on writing post lately. Today, I am sharing Jane’s story with you here. Thank her for permission to share her story, It had been very educational to me and I hope you could also learn something from her story.
In 2010, Jane was 34 years old. She was so happy that she was marrying her dream man. The night after her wedding, her newly wedded husband and mother in law forced her to sell her house and apartment in New York. Otherwise, they would divorce her. They beat her to the floor and completely ignored her begging and crying. At that time, a quick selfish thought of her parents not worthy of living in the new house in New York crossed Jane’s mind simply because her parents didn’t keep the house as clean and tidy as Jane would like to.
So Jane gave in to her newly wedded husband and mother in law’s unreasonable request. The third day after her wedding, she and her husband went back to her parent’s house with a real estate agent. She let her husband made a decision with the agent on the sale of the house without getting her parents’ input. The house was sold at the same price when she purchased and ignored the money that she spent on the renovation.
After that day, she had never gone back. Maybe because she didn’t have the courage to face her parents. She left the whole mess to her parents in terms of cleaning out all the stuff in the house and the apartment, and the moving. She didn’t even care where her parents would live and what kind of life her parents would have. All she had in mind was how to survive in her abusive marriage, and how to please her husband and mother in law so she wouldn’t be beat up too frequently.
Her marriage was like a nightmare. She was abused regularly. Thank to God’s mercy that the marriage only lasted for three years.
Ever since, she lived in regrets and sorry to her parents. Her parents loved her dearly, forgave her for everything she had done. Although her parents didn’t understand why she sold the house and apartment and left her parents living in a studio in someone’s basement because that’s all they could afford with their retirement. Because of their love for her, her parents never objected her decision of selling the house and apartment. What a contrast between the love of parents vs. the daughter!
Now, almost ten years later, the housing market in New York is almost doubled or tripled than ten years ago. Jane still couldn’t even afford to buy a studio in New York.
One quick selfish thought she had ten years ago, left herself and parents with nothing but regrets. She realized her mistake and wanted to make up to her parents but unfortunately her father passed away a few years ago. His death left Jane more regrets because those years before his death were the most difficult years in his life. Whenever she thought of that, she wished she could undo everything. Over the years, she forgave everything and everyone in her life including the abusive ex-husband and ex-mother in law, but she couldn’t forgive herself.
Now, she tries to be mindful of her thoughts and actions to avoid mistakes. She wishes one day she could truly face the darkness/selfish side hidden within herself and be able to forgive herself.
It was a tough lesson for her. She learned to treasure the people who love her in her life rather than taking them for granted, especially parents, family, and close friends.
Of course, my wishes for her is that she could forgive herself one day.
Serene Living with Divine Love 